Old habits die hard... when you have a sentimental heart.

    Guess what I'm doing tonight? Yeah... I'm watching another movie. I asked Addison to choose one and she brought me You've Got Mail. Surely, she's trying to bank bonus points for her teen years. You've Got Mail is one of my top five favorite movies. Yes, its cheesy. Yes, its predictable. I get lost in the simplicity, though. Lost. Besides the crush I've had on Meg Ryan for years, its the principle and the conversation that I get caught up in.

    People don't take the time to get to know one another anymore. You meet someone, you're attracted, you laugh and viola... Instant boyfriend. The "just add water" relationship approach has never suited me. Each of my more substantial relationships began with a foundation of years... Literally years of friendship. In each situation, all were at the time my "best" male friend. I don't take dating lightly... Heh... I'm sure that's no surprise... There isn't much I take lightly.

    I've met a fair amount of men online. We talk for a while, if they can maintain a conversation. During that time their position in my world is made. Friend, potential something more or someone that needs to be kicked. Most of the time this all takes place before physically meeting them... and most of them, after the first meeting, I never see again. I enjoy the anonymity of it all. And yes, I realize it allows me the opportunity for my guarded self to control the situation. Old habits... Old wounds... Etc etc. But I know what I'm looking for and if I don't see it, why play around?

    But here is where my frustration starts... put a woman & a man together for a long period of time and sex is sure to come up. The flirty banter, the long personal conversations... Its all foreplay, essentially. While these conversations can be fun as well, I find myself checking out once they start. Too often, I feel as if I was born in the wrong era... Or is it my liberal feminism that kicks in? Should I start screaming from the mountains "I want you to appreciate my mind, dammit! Who cares about my ass!". Hah... Oh the irony. I think both sides are at war here...

    I am an intelligent, multidimensional woman with plans... serious plans, to kick ass and take all the important names. {pumps fists and growls} I genuinely appreciate what people have to say and the brain they thought it with. Woo me with your wit and intellect... makes my knees weak, dammit. Your hair will fall out. Your gut will grow and my boobs will sag... more. Its all superficial bullshit. /rant

    {straightens hair} Apologies.

    Anyway, I'm sure you get my point. I realize Joe Fox and Kathleen Kelly are fictional and on paper we can all be super-hero's, but I've refused to believe I'm alone here. Saturday I took a left and headed north meeting a kindred spirit... who, for the last few weeks has proven to share a similar mentality. I'm totally digging the simplicity, the getting to know you, the honesty and the lack of pretension.

    What a truly rare and exciting find.

    1 comment:

    morsemusings said...

    And you are way, way, way ahead of the times. I applaud you for this. Also, I feel more normal because you were so able to put words into sentences about this whole mysterious missing link between the sexes.

    Ah, I will sleep better tonight.


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