Feels like space…

    4:30 brings me thoughts and ideas I’ve a hard time processing this morning. I’m thinking about the random happenstance that is friendship. How friendships posses the power to alter our existence. How precious the breaths we take are. How blessed I am to have never felt the permanent loss of a close loved one.

    I fondly recall the first time I met JC. It was months after hours and hours of phone conversations. I was amidst a painful breakup and finding my legs as a single parent, he was a lost soul juggling recovery, single parenthood and the recent illness of his father. We took a boat tour around Chicago and wandered the streets with more awkward silences than we’d ever encountered between us. Finally face to face with a close friend who helped me find my center and self respect again… and I couldn’t think of anything to say.

    I’ve only been face to face with JC twice. Yet I remember a time, not long ago, he was the first person I’d call if things went left and I felt like slipping back into my trenches.

    But today? Today our lives have taken us to opposite corners and we are left with a string of missed calls and voice mails. Today has left us so far apart that I am only to learn of the passing of his father through a Facebook status update. I feel an immense loss for this man… someone I’ve never met and only knew through stories and pictures. I only wish I could have been there for JC… been there to help him when his legs buckled and the world went black.

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