I keep hearing and reading about friends who’ve been in bad relationships and blah blah… I find myself thinking why we are all roaming around grouping these relationships into such category?
Were you abused? Because that’s bad.
Or did things just not work out and you went separate ways? Because that’s normal.
But I get the sense we don’t really know what normal is anymore. You’ve only two choices now… black or white.
I’m beginning to think I’ve either the most archaic notion of dating or just an absolutely new idea of it entirely. I meet someone. I run them through the various checks and balances and upon passing I then take it to the next level. Yes, I will go out on a date with you. After several successful dates, I then take it to the next level. Etc. Etc. Etc.
If at any point it’s determined that we are no longer compatible, I close up shop and move on. So, sure many dates and relationships haven’t ended up the way I wanted… that doesn’t make them bad does it? It makes them experience. If at any point I am intentionally lit on fire or if my face becomes the landing point for a large boulder or your fist, then yes… I will file that under bad.
But, if we learn from these relationships then those experiences propel us just a little further in our search for compatibility. So, how then can we justify calling them bad?
Personally, I thank them for their time and keep them as friends so I can reference how much I’ve grown and recall fondly the memories of when we were both less mature and dared to believe otherwise.