working list of resolutions.

    Dec 14 = My Great-Grandparents 55th wedding anniversary. My grams [Helen] passed away a few months ago. This is the first year my gramps [Al] will have been on his own since 1951. They were the kind of couple you wanted to be and not... all at the same time. They lived for each other, every day... but bickered constantly. Unfortunately, I was unable to spend the majority of my years with them. Contact was lost for 10 years, and living half-way across the country doesn't make Sunday brunches with the family an easy outing. To be honest, I wish I had made more of an effort to get to know her. I spoke with her a few weeks before she passed, but it should have been more. The first thing I am adding to my list of New Year’s Resolutions: Get to know my family again. 4 years away from an already detached family makes it easy to forget and devalue one another.

    Dec 15= My little principessa turned 3 months old. I have learned with her that time really is precious. I have my head in too many places all the time and I need to slow down and pay attention to here and now. Some have described me as a free spirit, a dreamer, maverick, and my favorite... eclectic. She keeps me grounded and reminds me not to lose myself. I have been around children my entire life and thought I was well prepared for motherhood, however, the last year really took a toll on me and I quickly realized that I am no better prepared for anything in life, let alone parenting, than anyone else. I was sitting here at the computer yesterday afternoon, just browsing the net… not looking at anything in particular, but completely transfixed. A sigh from across the room snapped me from my daze. Addi was laying on my bed, with her head turned facing me, smiling and waiting for my attention. I was blessed with the sweetest, most patient child. Second Resolution: Spend more time focusing on the relationship I am building with my little girl. She deserves more than what little I have with my mother.

    This was also my little sister’s 5th wedding anniversary. I cannot believe it has been that long. She has a little boy. He will be 2 in May. I have seen him once. When he was 6 months old. That solidifies my first New Year’s Resolution.

    Dec 16= This marks the day I have been dating the most wonderful man for 3 months. We have been on one crazy rollercoaster this year, and although there were days I cried and others I wanted to pull my hair out, I wouldn’t trade one moment of it. It led me here and I love this place. My third: stop living in the past and cherish the future. Live for this moment. Do it right the first time, so you don’t have to spend next year righting your wrongs.

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