A little of this. A little of that. And a lot more to come...

Today was my second day back at work. Something's missing. Oh, that's right... my commitment. Compared to the rewards of the last six weeks, it is not hard to imagine why. 

Aiden, who is now 7 weeks old, is spending time with an old friend of mine. Yes... he is spoiled and has found himself a nanny. Not sure many young men would complain about a tall, busty blonde doting on them all day, so I think he's enjoying himself. I am excited though to see my friend more... so much has changed this past year for us both, it is almost as if I've a new friend. 

A couple of days ago, my step-father killed himself. Pills. He was found outside... alone... face down in the ground. He died still unable to find peace. I'm tormented more by those thoughts than by any of the memories of my childhood. 

This weekend I turned thirty. I'm quite excited about my thirty's. My twenty's ended up being full of life lessons, new adventures and life long friends. Can't imagine how the next ten years are going to shape up, but I'm excited to find out. 

One year ago Monday, Navy Boy and I started out on this little adventure of ours. One year ago. Wow. What a ride. I'm so very lucky that my hesitation and his persistence paid off the way it did. 

On the way home tonight, I turned to the radio to relax. I flipped to the alternative station and turned that volume button full circle. The soundtrack for my journey proved to be quite a thrill. I'm definitely loving these tunes right now.

The sun... it rises slowly, as you walk.

I’m stealing an idea from a blogger I fell in love with about 2 years ago. As J says, “Amalia, she’s amazing.” And she truly is. Please. Go see for yourself... 

Today I am trusting … that is all. This is, at times, far more than I can accept… but I’m trying.

Today I am thankful for this man and the changes in my life he is inspiring.

Today I am inspired by an old soul I met via Twitter, @MorseMusings. We have shared the occasional comment here and there and her words always light a fire in my stomach and warm my soul. I ventured to her blog today, to catch up on my neglected readings. This woman is powerful. Graceful. Humble.

Quietly, I await the weekend. Addison and I will be participating in our first annual Breast Cancer walk.  I'm excited to share this experience with her and I look forward to many more. So far, that's the only plan this weekend. I'd love to grab my sketch book and head for the mountains... but alas... Illinois has none.

{chew.chew.snap} Saw this and thought of you.

"Don't even try to challenge me... I'll blow you away."

-Natalie Dee

This man? He's kind of a big deal yo.

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... And we're off!

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How loud can silence get?

Do you ever find yourself with so much to say, yet are unable to put the words together for fear of jinxing something or worse yet... saying too much, too soon? 

Old habits die hard... when you have a sentimental heart.

Guess what I'm doing tonight? Yeah... I'm watching another movie. I asked Addison to choose one and she brought me You've Got Mail. Surely, she's trying to bank bonus points for her teen years. You've Got Mail is one of my top five favorite movies. Yes, its cheesy. Yes, its predictable. I get lost in the simplicity, though. Lost. Besides the crush I've had on Meg Ryan for years, its the principle and the conversation that I get caught up in.

People don't take the time to get to know one another anymore. You meet someone, you're attracted, you laugh and viola... Instant boyfriend. The "just add water" relationship approach has never suited me. Each of my more substantial relationships began with a foundation of years... Literally years of friendship. In each situation, all were at the time my "best" male friend. I don't take dating lightly... Heh... I'm sure that's no surprise... There isn't much I take lightly.

I've met a fair amount of men online. We talk for a while, if they can maintain a conversation. During that time their position in my world is made. Friend, potential something more or someone that needs to be kicked. Most of the time this all takes place before physically meeting them... and most of them, after the first meeting, I never see again. I enjoy the anonymity of it all. And yes, I realize it allows me the opportunity for my guarded self to control the situation. Old habits... Old wounds... Etc etc. But I know what I'm looking for and if I don't see it, why play around?

But here is where my frustration starts... put a woman & a man together for a long period of time and sex is sure to come up. The flirty banter, the long personal conversations... Its all foreplay, essentially. While these conversations can be fun as well, I find myself checking out once they start. Too often, I feel as if I was born in the wrong era... Or is it my liberal feminism that kicks in? Should I start screaming from the mountains "I want you to appreciate my mind, dammit! Who cares about my ass!". Hah... Oh the irony. I think both sides are at war here...

I am an intelligent, multidimensional woman with plans... serious plans, to kick ass and take all the important names. {pumps fists and growls} I genuinely appreciate what people have to say and the brain they thought it with. Woo me with your wit and intellect... makes my knees weak, dammit. Your hair will fall out. Your gut will grow and my boobs will sag... more. Its all superficial bullshit. /rant

{straightens hair} Apologies.

Anyway, I'm sure you get my point. I realize Joe Fox and Kathleen Kelly are fictional and on paper we can all be super-hero's, but I've refused to believe I'm alone here. Saturday I took a left and headed north meeting a kindred spirit... who, for the last few weeks has proven to share a similar mentality. I'm totally digging the simplicity, the getting to know you, the honesty and the lack of pretension.

What a truly rare and exciting find.