Live simply so others may simply live.

Oh, that Mother Theresa still gets to me. And Simple Mom, Tsh, she's been holding my attention for a while, too. I recently bought her book, Organized Simplicity. Read it cover and to cover and have been working to implement her mindset into my life. I even recruited my boyfriend… ok. Perhaps, I strong-armed him a little. ;) I joke… I joke…

I read the newest post by Tsh this morning amidst a rather large heated cup of coffee… literally and figuratively. I’ve fought very hard to cut the superficial from my life, from my daughter’s life, yet recently it has crept in. I feel, and even see, its grimy little fingers taking hold of my budding family’s conversations and I don’t like it.

I’ve tried to teach my daughter the beauty of appreciation and of the few luxuries, which even she as the daughter of a single mother, had. I have wanted to enlist her help in giving back and to help those less fortunate, but never knew just where to physically start. I think the following story and Tsh’s experiences are the perfect addition to begin implementing this mindset with both her and K. I love Tsh’s breakdown of how simple it is for us to make a difference and how even the smallest of sacrifices in our lives effect those we dare not think of.

Unfortunately, I have found humility and selflessness don’t go as far as they used to. I’m determined to change that. Luckily, I have two little girls with the biggest hearts by my side.

Oxenreider, Tsh. “Now that you know, what will you do?” SimpleMom.net, June 3, 2011

Every passing moment is another chance to turn it all around.

And though it was salt water, there was something 'bout the way it tasted so familiar.

Josh Ritter - Change of Time

Somedays I wish I had a clone... but I know I couldn't live with the bitch.

Recently, I struggle with time management... ok. There may be a little motivation issue, too... but mostly I'm just feeling worn out. I'm dating a great single father with full custody of his daughter and with the distance and schedules between us; we've been locked into a weekend romance. Problem is this; the weekends are the only time I have to get anything done.

It’s difficult to not step on toes or hurt feelings when trying to manage two households and maintain sanity. I feel like I've slid into a nice little funk... it worries me. I can't lie. How many times have you heard your friends, or yourself, comment on how much individuality was lost during such and such relationship? I've done it before. It’s far too easy to become comfortable in the new collective and abandon all other responsibilities and interests.  Even the simple things in my life have been neglected. You should have seen the cobwebs and the spider I had to sword fight just to post this.

Now, don't get me wrong. I've enjoyed my distraction. Relish it even. Perhaps, I'm just pushing out of that cocoon new lovers wrap themselves in, but I fear an issue starting to arise. Because our daily schedules are so vastly different, when he's ready to settle down and have brilliant conversations... I've just gotten home and have a shit-ton of strings to tie up. Some nights I'm so tired and cranky from the hoops of the day a simple "goodnight" is all I have the energy for. 

If you have any snippets of brilliance you’d like to share, I’m ready, man. Advice. Stories. Cute little cartoon pictures… or perhaps you’d like to donate some time? I could set up a donation link… it’ll be classy.

Hope you brought your hat... I'm having a party.

I feel like something very large has been sitting on my chest for about two months now. I've been struggling to not let it bother me and I'm trying not to feel like I'm taking my last deep breaths, but I'm exhausted. Is there no end? My legs are tired from jumping these hurdles and I can almost taste the salty tears I've been holding back.

Shame on this song for opening the gates...

I've been telling myself for too long "something's got to change" and as of two weeks ago, I finally realized what it was. I'm keeping the details to myself a while longer, but acknolweding what has been staring me in the face, listening to what friends have been repeating for too long... and then this... well. Its enough.

Its time I set out to accomplish what I came here for.

p.s. This is not a tale of boys and heartbreak. Finally.
And that... well, that alone inspires me even more.

Creative orgasm's you say? {blushes}

I find inspiration in the oddest of places sometimes – I guess that’s the point though, right? Always be watching and looking for the extraordinary, everyday occurrences with potential to change your soul? Eh, well that’s how I live, anyway. Pro and con of my personality.

The other night The Gentleman snuck in and nuzzled his way past the surface and tried, once again, to pry at my edges. One day this man and I will sit and have a proper conversation. [If you’re reading this: I’ll bring the coffee, you bring the Sinatra]

Anyhoo, between him and my other muse, whom I can’t even tell you how we came to “know” one another (she’s in Ireland, I believe) I’ve decided to branch out – stop the constant collecting of ideas and make something freaking happen! I’ve talked about doing something creative for too long now and these two have pushed me over the edge.

I’m working on Addi’s birthday party invitations right now… something lighthearted and simple I felt was the perfect place to start.

One small step for Nikki...one more small step for Nikki…

Great. Now I am quoting Space Chimps. This can’t be good for my health.

Alice in Nowhere In Particular

Give a damn, get a lot.

Indexed is one of my favorite sites... that chick is so clever and witty. I swear she was in my head today. Its 10 pm, Friday night. And I am still in the office.

[Never mind the fact that I spent nearly three hours chatting with a new friend on FaceBook]

My passion lies elsewhere right now... and I'm finding it hard to maintain my focus here at the 9-5. Maybe my head will clear up after the New Orleans trip (which is next week... WEEEE!) and our office move.

I really hope so.

Funny... not ha-ha funny, but still funny.

PISCES: February 19 - March 20th

You are focusing on intellectual pursuits right now and you ought to be able to satisfy your own curiosity and impress all the right people simultaneously. Take serious things seriously.

This is fitting for my head today...

Taken from I Wrote This For You

The Rain Will Fall And I Won't Care

Being enlightened doesn't mean being happy. It means you're ok even when things aren't.

~

Interesting weekend. Lots of thoughts. Lots of changes. I'm excited and find myself looking forward to tomorrow with more exhileration than I can ever remember. I'm cutting this off here... if I give you all the goodies now, you've no reason to come back. And I want you here... with me... on this new journey.

I'm stealing a line or two from a new friend, "I am pretty much standing on the edge of a cliff hanging one foot over the ledge. It isn't my intention to have you try and pull me back, but maybe in a way I'm just asking you to join me for a moment and look down."

This, for me, is about absolute self-acceptance, trust, and exploration. Ha! Interesting... that seems to be something this new friend is looking for, too. Interesting time for us to have come into one another's life.

Now's the chance to sing the things you could never say.

For some reason, I find I am spending more time frustrated than not... and I shouldn't. Now is the season of butterflies. Every time I try to figure out what it is, I come back to the same destination... I think it's Flannigan. I know that means nothing to you. That's the point. Flannigan embodies everything I thought I wanted. Sometimes, I still wonder. Am I working towards that same goal now? I don't know. I thought I was... in a different way, but the grass is always greener on the other side... that's what they say, right?

I will admit I am to some extent, high maintenance. Yes, I dare to put that in writing... I am sure it will haunt me later. The point is, somewhere, Flannigan changed. I did not. I still want the same things... and I deserve the best of those. We all do. Is it that the desire and motivation is gone or can I just not see it? I do need to get my eyes checked... maybe I've just lost focus.